My family's the best as I know and I'm more than glad to do anything which makes them happy. They're impeccable in every way they love me. I couldn't even think of living without them.
But there's an issue here.
No matter how much I try to live up to them, I never satisfy them.
It annoys me that there's no comparison to how I'm and what they expect of me.
They don't want me to have any friends, even if I have, I shouldn't talk to them, even if I talk, I shouldn't laugh over something funny or enjoy so much which might draw attention.
All my life, I always find me awaiting their approval to whatever I do.
It's like, I don't deserve anyone only because I'm born a girl.
Oh, there's an exception for me, that's when I'm married, I'll have a husband.
I don't have a slightest idea he'd be fair or mean.
My question is, is it reasonable that every girl has to live with in boundaries and with whatever has been decided at the time of her birth?
I know this is nothing when compared to what I receive ( reminding you, my family's most wonderful one, and if given chance, though I don't wanna be born again, I'd choose the same family without any moment's hesitation ), but sometimes, I feel like dying rather than having to carry all this inside me.
As much as I'm worried to death about marriage, I wish I could get married and soon leave home.
( I hate this. )
And, nonetheless, I hope for a husband, who would understand me with all this, that having friends and sharing things with them, is quite as natural as breathing.
But, they say no man would be good enough to do what I will him to do. God bless me !!
It's no wonder every woman has this pain. No matter how happy and sound she appears to be.
And I'm neither a fool to think it's big problem nor I don't know it will pass.
But, I want every reader of this post to remember how difficult it is for a girl to live every minute of her life, doing things and either worrying or wondering whether it'd be okay or not. And how many heart breaks she's to survive all along, throughout her life.
I never want to forget how it feels like, to give up all the emotional needs for the sake of restrictions so as not to hurt my daughter in future.
P.S. Freedom shouldn't be given much, either. We should learn to balance many things in life and this is one of the most important. I'm willing to learn.
But there's an issue here.
No matter how much I try to live up to them, I never satisfy them.
It annoys me that there's no comparison to how I'm and what they expect of me.
They don't want me to have any friends, even if I have, I shouldn't talk to them, even if I talk, I shouldn't laugh over something funny or enjoy so much which might draw attention.
All my life, I always find me awaiting their approval to whatever I do.
It's like, I don't deserve anyone only because I'm born a girl.
Oh, there's an exception for me, that's when I'm married, I'll have a husband.
I don't have a slightest idea he'd be fair or mean.
My question is, is it reasonable that every girl has to live with in boundaries and with whatever has been decided at the time of her birth?
I know this is nothing when compared to what I receive ( reminding you, my family's most wonderful one, and if given chance, though I don't wanna be born again, I'd choose the same family without any moment's hesitation ), but sometimes, I feel like dying rather than having to carry all this inside me.
As much as I'm worried to death about marriage, I wish I could get married and soon leave home.
( I hate this. )
And, nonetheless, I hope for a husband, who would understand me with all this, that having friends and sharing things with them, is quite as natural as breathing.
But, they say no man would be good enough to do what I will him to do. God bless me !!
It's no wonder every woman has this pain. No matter how happy and sound she appears to be.
And I'm neither a fool to think it's big problem nor I don't know it will pass.
But, I want every reader of this post to remember how difficult it is for a girl to live every minute of her life, doing things and either worrying or wondering whether it'd be okay or not. And how many heart breaks she's to survive all along, throughout her life.
I never want to forget how it feels like, to give up all the emotional needs for the sake of restrictions so as not to hurt my daughter in future.
P.S. Freedom shouldn't be given much, either. We should learn to balance many things in life and this is one of the most important. I'm willing to learn.
2 comments:
God bless u a loving husband who can balance every thing as u dream
>:D< :)
Thanks so much ma :)
Bless yu :)
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